I’ve read several blogs lately of people who are in long distance relationships. It got me thinking back to the relationships that I was in back in college that were long distance. I am happy to say that the last long distance relationship I was in ended up in marriage! 🙂 17 years strong!
I thought I’d write a post about somethings that can make being a part a little easier as well as keeping each of you in check.
I’ll have to preface this by saying that I am a bit envious, as the internet was in it’s infancy when I met Rob. Cell phones weren’t something everyone owned at the time either. So being long distance was quite a bit more difficult 17-18 years ago.
1. Communicate every day (Not just texting). I think it is so important for people to have real conversations. I mean that sounds so funny, but I look at how people communicate now and it seems most of our communicating is done through print, either by text or by email. I think for a relationship to stay vibrant, you need to either, talk on the phone, talk on Facetime, or Skype. We’re so lucky now in that, long distance phone bills are a thing of the past. Hallelujah!
2. See each other as often as possible. Keeping that flame alive is what will keep your relationship strong. Nothing is better for that connection than a visit. Even if it’s a quick visit. It’s better than not seeing each other at all.
3. Have a goal in mind. If you’re in a long distance relationship and you don’t have a plan of when you will live closer to each other, you and/or your partner may start to wonder. You may wonder “what’s the point in this relationship?” or wonder in other ways.
4. Know each others’ schedule. It’s just good to know what your partner is doing. You may be sitting around bored, but you know when good/bad times to call/text are when you know their schedule. Could really cancel out some awkward moments.
5. Don’t keep secrets. Simple. As. That!
6. Give each other space. This may seem contradictory to other statements in this list, but just say for example; Your boyfriend says he’s going to a party Friday night with some guys. Don’t call him, or even text him during that time. If you have a strong relationship, you should trust him and you should allow him time out with his friends.
7. Go on Facetime dates.
This could range from just watching a movie together while on Facetime, to taking each other along for a walk while on Facetime on your iPhone.
8. Have your own life. In any relationship, whether it be long distance or not, it’s important for you to have your own group of friends and allow each other to have girls’/guys’ nights out and do lunch, etc.
9. Share and listen…even the day-to-day stuff. Sharing what you ate for lunch or what a coworker said, is what people do in everyday life when they’re together. So don’t allow distance to negate that part of your relationship.
10. Establish confidence in the relationship. Don’t put yourself in positions where trust could be put at risk. Don’t cross those lines.
I hope that if you’re in a long distance relationship it’s great. I would love to hear your take on it and what things you do to help those long stretches of time when you can’t see each other face-to-face. In the mean time, best of luck!